No, not gonna read it!

John made a list of classic books he hasn't read yet. Raidergirl made her list, a list of books she's never going to read. Never is a strong word. I'll read just about anything, but there are a few I'm pretty sure I won't be reading. I won't say never because, you never know, I might be stuck in an underground bunker with only one of these titles handy.

  • Anything else by Hemmingway. I read a couple. That's enough.
  • Ulysses by James Joyce. It's reputation proceeds it.
  • The Portrait of a Lady by Henry James. A haiku by me:

The Portrait mocks
Run on sentences
Unreadable James

  • DH Lawrence. Ditto.

There may be more, but that's all I can think of. That's classics. Here's a couple of newer ones:

  • Paris Hilton's 'autobiography' Confessions of an Heiress. Like, whatever, no way. In the same vein, Don't Hassle the Hoff.
  • Anything else by Nicholas Sparks. I read a couple. Sappy, and don't get attached to the characters.
  • Anne Rice's Jesus book. I'd be picturing vampire Tom Cruise the whole time.

What's on your list?


  1. Too funny about James and DH Lawerence. But I TOTALLY AGREE!!

    I nominated you for a "Thoughtful Blogger" Award! So come over and check it out!

  2. OMG, I also posted my distain for 'Don't Hassle the Hoff' on my blog! Even before I came here and read yours. Hilarious. That's sure to be a popular read.

    I don't think I'll ever read another book by Dan Brown ("The DaVinci Code" was enough for me) or Mitch Albom ("Tuesdays with Morrie"...blech).

  3. LOL, love this. I'm trying to think who I won't read. Hmmm. Anne Rice, for sure. Nothing. Ever again. I've never made it through any of her books, and I've tried many.

    And if George "Dubya" Bush ever writes one, I won't be picking that one up. ;)

  4. Totally agree with everything by James Joyce and Henry James. Unreadable, IMHO. And I was an English major. Also, BILLY BUDD by Herman Melville. How he could write something so brilliant as MOBY DICK and then write that is beyond me. As for something more contemporary, can't read Danielle Steele or Mary Higgins Clark. And Patricia Cornwell went totally downhill after her first three Scarpetta books.

  5. I'm with you on the Ncholas Sparks - I havne't liked much of his stuff.
    Love the hiaku! I want to do a haiku too!
    And, I signed up for the Read the Pulitzer Prize winners, and three of the books on my list are Pulitzers, so eventually I'll get to them.

  6. I totally borrowed this meme from you. It was good food for thought!

    Although, now that you've mentioned Don't Hassle the Hoff, which I didn't even know existed, I have this sick desire to read it. Kind of like the desire to rubberneck at the site of a horrific accident. I must resist!

    I've never read Joyce or Lawerence, so I don't have much commentary there, although I have had other people who read Ulysses warn me away, with frantic capslock over e-mail/instant messenger. I think I'm going to take the hint.

  7. Ha! Love it. I'm with you on the Ulysses and all of your contemporary choices. I don't know anyone who's read that Anne Rice book. I wish a kindly blogger I know would do so, so we could get an entertaining review.

  8. I'm glad I got you all thinking ;)

    Stephanie- Thanks *blush*

    Kookiejar- The Hoff. He's just asking to be picked on.

    Andi- I liked Rice's Mayfair Witches series but her writing just isn't my thing anymore.

    Karen- Never read Moby Dick. I've heard it's a love it or hate it book. You liked it? I was at one time a MHC fan, but I came to realize that she was writing the same book over and over, just with different characters.

    Raidergirl- This topic is catching on! Thanks for the idea. I don't know why I did the haiku. I've been seeing them everywhere. Good luck with the challenge.

    C.R.- I'll have to check out your list! Maybe you sound read The Hoof and review it. hehe

    Imani- I wish someone would too!

  9. Hated Moby Dick. Pretty good list there of Never Gonna Read It books! Pretty much mine too. ITA about Hemingway, especially after slogging through The Old Man and the Freaking Sea.

  10. I completely agree with you about Nicholas Sparks books. And I generally don't read books about celebrities, especially the people who are celebrities for absolutely no reason at all!

    I would also never pick up another book by Ayn Rand.

  11. How funny! I have NO desire to read anything else by James (I read Portrait of the Artist twice for school and that was more than enough). I totally agree with your Haiku after reading PoaL a few months ago. Ugh!


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